4/20 used to be a lovely day where I would get together with friends and celebrate the pseudo-holiday. Alas, those glory days are gone, and there is one simple reason for why I can no longer celebrate 4/20… my stupid cunt wife.
Oh it’s not entirely her fault I guess. She means well. After all, adulthood and raising children is a tall order, so I get why she feels that we have to be on our “A game” in our day-to-day lives. The stressors of commuting, killing it at work, caring for a home, and rearing little ones means that there is simply no time for fun anymore, as my stupid cunt wife so often reminds me.
“But dear,” I interject, “can one make the argument that weed actually helps to put a mellow cap on an otherwise bustling day?”
“No,” my stupid cunt wife regurgitates. “No it doesn’t. Now pour me some wine so I can take the edge off.”
I love my stupid cunt wife, I really do. But sometimes she can be a real stupid cunt. You feel me?